It's her birthday. Freedom 55. I've got a whole year to go before I'm that old, if I live that long.
So, I switched shifts, managed to book Thursday and Friday off, and checked out reservations at a romantic, national historic site hotel in La Conner. Figured she could brouse the shops while I sat in a waterfront bar paying American dollars for crappy American beer.
And, now I'm in trouble. She has plans. Girls of the neighborhood are taking her out for lunch Thursday and she's got another person's birthday to celebrate Friday. And, I didn't tell her ahead of time so she could anticipate the event (evidently a big part of a successful marriage).
I don't have another gift idea. Besides, she keeps returning the stuff I get her.
Might go fishing, but the weather's turning to rain again.
Might just slit my throat.
-baglo
The Replies:
In that case, can I have your fly gear?
- Dan Kennaley
Rockwood, Ontario, Canada
I'm sure she'd love a Simms wading jacket.
-Ian.
When you're finished, may i have your Leica?
But seriously, she'll love you for having planned the thing. Good luck,
- glm
As a marriage counselor, I conclude your pretty much Scr*wed. I'll send the divorce kit in the mail tomorrow. Wait...... As a last resort, depending on her personality, you might try something like a gift certificate to a spa or some other luxury that she wouldn't give herself often. Cash is good. :-0
Doing something for her that you should already be doing (like the lawn) might bring tears to her eyes, but that's doesn't work very well with my wife....(the tears are out of relief, not joy) :-)
Baglo, Anything you can do to prove her mother (or father) wrong about you would probably be a good thing. If you frame it right, you might get a fishing trip out of it.
Like...uhm.... Honey, My sweetest little Baggett..., I want you to take the weekend and pamper yourself.... you deserve it Honey bunch.... Here is the number to a spa... Naww....don't worry about the cost. If you need me, I'll be up at *#&$* river , just waiting for you to come home....
(Good luck!)
-Tim
Actually, Baglo should go with his original plan and just do the gift certificate to the same joint. Pay the one night deposit so that it shows up on the credit card statement. Points can be made for demonstrating the "E" word - Effort. Then, he can probably still go fishing on Thursday or Friday.
-John
Well, that's for the Old Bag to suggest. "Honey, how thoughtful of you. I'm sorry I have something going on both days. Gee, since you already have the time off, you should go fishing! Take the sleeping bag and fish both days!"
I still think this will work better than giving her the Simms jacket, tempting though that may be.
- John
Hell Bags, give her the gift she's been dreaming of while you still can, your absence!
- John
Okay, I screwed up.
She didn't want to go to La Conner, she wanted to go to Snohomish. What do I know? They're both in Washington State and they probably sell the same birds carved out of the same dried mushrooms in every same shop on Main Street.
Using women's intuition and her other senses, she figured I didn't really want to go anyway since I have no desire to feed the economy that keeps shoving our exports up our O*vis with tariffs and taxes.
So, I got her a huge hanging basket. Apparently the flowers are purple, not pink like I imagined. And they don't match. And, I bought it at the exclusive garden shop at five times the price she could have got it for.
Bottle of champagne I got doesn't match the other bottle of champagne in the fridge either (she's serving her friends and doesn't want mis-matched wines).
All she really wants, she says, is companionship.
So, I invited her to go fishing.
Figured she could use my gear - take a couple of friends.
And, I could get the lawn mowed.
"There are no steelhead".
