"You're not getting the Simm's vest", said the Old Bag.
"We can't afford it".
I'm not sure how she worked that out, since she doesn't open any mail and has no idea what's in her account, never mind mine. But, I was kind of relieved that I wasn't getting another Simm's vest, since I bought myself one last summer.
It's the wading jacket that's on my list, and that's what I'm not getting.
In the spirit of Christmas, the Old Bag has decided we'll just give one another stocking-stuffers, you know, $100 worth of useless junk, and in the spirit of Christmas, she bought the tree this year, without consulting us.
It's been a Christmas tradition in our family to go the tree lot and stand in the rain and dark while the Old Bag searches for the perfect tree. And, it's been a Christmas tradition for me to end up shivering in the car, cursing Santa and screaming at the sun-visor, "Just Pick One"!!!!
The Baguette comes back to the car shortly after me, to sulk in the back seat because the Old Bag won't approve of the 24' Noble Fir that she wants.
So this year, the Old Bag chose it all by herself.
We were informed after the deed was done and I got to pick it up, all trussed like a turkey. And, while the Old Bag was at work, I got to move the furniture and find a spot for it in the livingroom. I may have done something right. I put it in the same place it's been every year for the past twenty.
And, the Baguette is already complaining.
"She paid $75 for that little tree?"
"It's got holes in it".
"it's an ugly tree, the more I look at it the uglier it gets".
And, I'm thinking, $75, at least, would have been a down payment on that Simm's wading jacket.
We have much more of the Christmas spirit to share. First the Old Bag and Baguette will decorate the tree together, and then, after the Baguette has gone to bed, the Old Bag will move everything around. Baguette will NOT pretend not to notice.
I'll put presents under the tree and the Old Bag will put them in the closet until Christmas eve.
I'll claim she said she was going to water it, and when it is all over and done, I'll forget to put it by the curb for recycling and end up throwing it over the back fence into the lane allowance.
You wouldn't do that with a Simm's Guide wading jacket, probably size M or L, available at Highwater Tackle and other fine retailers.
"There are no steelhead".
